I abandoned deep theology for

I abandoned deep theology for the simple applications of "Brown Like Coffee" and it is just what I needed.

Nothing like a weekend with

Nothing like a weekend with a toddler to give a solid dose of emotional birth control. Even a sweet one like Monet will get you ragged.

Since we dont have internet

Since we dont have internet at our apartment I am going to take a go at updating this via text. They will have to stay short and....

psalms

I am a huge fan of Jon Acuff's blogging and often it gets me thinking ... I don't usually comment because I feel like it is silly since if it is read, it is most likely read by people who don't know me.

You may not know me, but it is much more likely that you do, so I thought this would be a better place to post such things.

Today he asked what books of the bible terrify you and I replied James didn't (a fact I credit in part to John Fooshe - one of my high school youth pastors as it was his unapologetic favorite) but sometimes the psalms terrify me.

They are emotional and so human - and lets be honest some of the sentiments expressed are more than shocking in their violence and self righteousness. Really what scares me about the psalms is how they are so many of the things I fear.

I may be one of the most obscenely emotional people on the planet - I definitely feel that way sometimes. And I hate it. Not for good reasons, not even for particularly logical reasons but I do.

And the psalms are chock full of emotion, and they don't always make sense (which I suppose is true of much of the bible) and they are pretty and popular (and lets be real I have some unfortunate trouble liking popular things).

But even as I type this I am reminded of the things I learned from Lewis' Reflections on the Psalms and from Dr. Judge's class and I have to say there is a lot of good there (funny how that happens in the bible).

True Words from Lee and Acuff

"I think, as humans, we miss God. Alot. Our sinful nature hides Him from us... God isn't hiding, maybe just I am." Erin

Really you could say we have always been hiding - we just found new fig leaves.

Other Relevant Thoughts

My life and readings

Life and wedding planning are coming along well. Apparently I will be Mrs. Fox in 61 days - that is a little daunting but exciting.

We have been trying to find a place to live. We found one we both like but we have a few places left to check out before we commit officially. Life feels weird, transitions are like that I suppose.

I haven't been reading as much as I would like, but here are my recent completions

Feb 17 - Crazy Love by Francis Chan
It was a phenomenal book. I would recommend it unflinchingly because he addresses issues where we are not living as the church ought, but he does it from a place of love. Loving the church and the reader - not just pointing to specks.

Feb 26- Ish by Peter Reynolds
It doesn't really count toward my goal of reading 3 books a month since it is a kids book (in the way curious gorge is not in the way that Narnia is) but it is also wonderful. It is basically about a boy giving himself the freedom to create. I want to own this someday - and read it often.

Mar 10 - Northanger Abbey by Jane Austen
My first reaction is merely to sigh. Jane Austen somehow manages to run the entirety of my emotions through a ringer - even though there is never a moment where you can doubt the ultimate happiness of her main characters. The circumstances are not suspenseful, no one's life is ever in any real jeopardy and yet there were moments were I could not read more than a page or two without having to stop in utter consternation and overflowing emotion (of course I found myself at those pages while in the company of my fiancee and his 18 year old brother and they were not sympathetic to my plight) . Personally I think Jane Austen is brilliant beyond reason. You don't have to agree with me, but I love her.


Keeping up with my photoblog has been going pretty well (largely because I discovered the joy of scheduled posts, which are perfect for people who don't necessarily get online daily) - I am rediscovering how much beauty the world holds and that is lovely. I am even entering a piece from the beginning of the year in a juried show in Anderson - so we shall see how that goes.

Two goals

I have made it my goal to update my photoblog daily (and the others at least monthly - but I have said that before). It is my way of pretending I am using my degree.

I have also made it my goal to read at least three books a month since graduation. I haven't precisely succeeded so far but I have read

Dec 16 - Porn Nation by Michael Leahy
An interesting read where one man discusses how he progressed from porn to sexual addiction and the havoc that played on his life.

Dec 24 - An Acceptable Time by Madeline L'Engle
It was a good bit of fiction. L'Engle has interesting ways of playing with time and seems to have an awkward relationship with the idea of the noble savage because on the one hand she refutes it, then tries to create the one exception to it with the People of the Wind. A general trend I have seen in her fiction is that she seems torn between ideas that don't seem (at least to me) to fully play out together, but they are still great stories.

Jan 5 - The Four Loves by CS Lewis
Of course I loved it. As the title suggests it is a look at the different ways we love, where those loves come from and how they affect us. It raised good questions and answered unspoken anxieties. I like Lewis so it is no surprise that I liked it.

Jan 22 - Confessions of the Ugly Stepsister by Gregory Maguire
I LOVED IT SO MUCH! Oh malanta, I personally think he is a genius in the way he crafts a shockingly convincing and realistic back story to one of the most well known and re-fitted fairy tales. It was phenomenal, set in Holland among painters during tulip mania. I really can't stop geeking out about it, I plan to re-read it soon. Although maybe I should just watch the movie '-P

Feb 4 - The Voice of Matthew by Laura Winner
Winner translates/paraphrases the gospel of Matthew (the gospel written for Jews) from her perspective as a Messianic Jew as part of the voice project (which recognizes that the bible is filled with books written by different people and is trying to translate the books in a way that allows that individuality to remain). It was good to just sit and let the story of Jesus soak in with new language and thinking about nuances I hadn't previously.

Feb 8 - His Needs, Her Needs by Willard Harely Jr.
This is the book Chris and I were given for premarital counseling. I gulped it down in part because I didn't like it at all in the beginning. I am still not sure that I like it, but I think it will be a good place to begin discussions and it surely brings up some of the awkward and/or unpleasant things that Chris and I might not have gotten around to talking about on our own (which is kind of the point of premarital counseling).

Right now I am reading "Batman and Philosophy" and Francis Chan's "Crazy Love" and I am loving them both ....